Many fans have requested private and secure membership on my site, which will be available soon.  I plan

to film many secret places my father worked, raced, and lived from Hollywood to New York -- and back to

Hollywood where he was signed to play Cal in EAST OF EDEN.

This will be exclusive to fans who are members.  This site, my book and screenplay, HOLLYWOOD "LIT..." are dedicated

to my father's memory and I intend to film everything I find both new and past with integrity since I was born and raised without a trace of it.

I will also film the gray lonely road and intersection where my father was killed while driving his Porsche to a race

he had entered the next day on the coast of Salinas.  As I stated before, the dust still has not settled, nor the ghosts

who seem to still haunt the desolate roadside.   When I walk along the fences there -- I feel his presence -- as if he

is pushing me on, nudging from an unknown place.  I hope to find "that" place with you, his fans.

Serious investors are welcome to help independently bring HOLLYWOOD "LIT..." to the big screen.  The tragic,

ending will haunt audiences for years to come -- as it does to me daily.  I walk it alone.

Finally, as I have stated in my book and site, portions of the proceeds from my book and movie will be used

to build a home for abused and abandoned babies as promised from the beginning of my journey.  There

are too many "crippled" adults in the world because they were abandoned and forgotten.  It haunts me

and it hurts me to know how many little one's I need to help.  I can feel them -- alone.

DI DEAN      didean.net              HOLLYWOOD "LIT..."

the Most Perfect Legs" for 2008 as voted by 25 fashion designers.

The release sent out by the organization revealed that DEAN'S leg measurements are ankle- 6 inches,

mid calf- 8 inches, mid thigh 10 inches.  The 5 foot 8 1/2 inch actress-author-filmmaker

has a 34 inch inseam and a 7 1/2  narrow shoe size while weighing in at 80 pounds.

Previous winners of this International Award number -- Brigitte Bardot, Ava Gardner, Babe Paley,

Jackie Kennedy and Lana Turner.

I am both honored and very humbled.

DI DEAN   didean.net

Maybe one denies what happens to their body while pushing themselves to bring a

vision to the fore front, such as a book or screenplay?  Diving into the past, coming

up for air, writing the details, and then diving back down to a darker place and

retrieving that pain -- is a must.   No one else has walked in my boots, my

skeletal body, nor my wounds which refuse to heal, because I continue to

dive for more -- truth.  My young years, fractured skull.  

I dive again today, this time farther down than before.  Memory banks open,

pain floods in and I write what I remember.  My appetite for food doesn't

exist because it's been replaced by a "force" chasing me.  My father's ghost

pushing me to dive again -- until I reach the bottom where secrets live.

DI DEAN  didean.net

looked me up and down, shook her head, and finally said, "I bet you barely weigh 80 pounds, and you should

get some immediate help."  I was mortified, embarrassed, hurt.  No, shocked that anyone would say

such things to a complete stranger -- and I just left my basket and ran out of the store.

The truth does hurt.  Here goes.  I've been putting in long hours chasing memories, writing HOLLYWOOD "LIT..."

Part II, and pushing myself to a limit never before attempted.  My weight has dropped to 78, boots and all,

and now I know it's because of circumstances which I am just beginning to understand.

One's soul answers to one's soul.  Bottom line?  Millions of dollars could never take the pain of what

I endure daily -- away.  The only thing I have -- is me, and hopefully attached,  something called

integrity to all, and everything I touch.  I was born to JAMES DEAN.  He never knew I existed.

Can I climb back into time and change all the circumstances which brought me forth?  No, I cannot.

The only thing I can do -- is forge on, into the "night" of writing from my soul and cover all the

painful places with the salve of healing, which I cannot seem to find.

DI DEAN   didean.net

 

which I am currently working on.  I sneak back into the memories and

slice through bits of time which I had fought very hard -- to forget.

You, my readers have blatantly asked for more of my young years --

so this is where I am.  Sneaking out from behind the fog where I've

been hiding -- still embarrassed by the cloak given me to -- bear.

The little bastard.

DI DEAN  www.didean.net

Tonight, the 80th Academy Awards ceremony is being held as I write this blog.  Phone calls, emails, contacts, and all of you who showed up at my HOLLYWOOD "LIT..." book signing last weekend stated they could not wait until the movie is made.  I humbly thank you ALL -- for driving such long distances -- for telling me that my life story of rejection and abandonment parallels a movie my father made called EAST OF EDEN.  You honored my father -- and you honored me.  I am driven to bring HOLLYWOOD "LIT..." to audiences who like you, felt their heart cry.

Thank you to all.

Tonight, the 80th Academy Awards ceremony is being held as I write this blog.  Phone calls, emails, contacts, and all of you who showed up at my HOLLYWOOD "LIT..." book signing last weekend stated they could not wait until the movie is made.  I humbly thank you ALL -- for driving such long distances -- for telling me that my life story of rejection and abandonment parallels a movie my father made called EAST OF EDEN.  You honored my father -- and you honored me.  I am driven to bring HOLLYWOOD "LIT..." to audiences who like you, felt their heart cry.

BORDERS, Goleta is holding another HOLLYWOOD "LIT..."  book signing for me and I thank you all for making this possible, although I must admit it's still embarrassing.  Hard to explain.  I don't have all the answers to my life story -- except that I was raised in secrecy, hidden, forbidden to speak about "who" I am until the last few years.  

Thanks for all your inquiries, your concerns, your prayers.

DI DEAN

BORDERS, Goleta is holding another HOLLYWOOD "LIT..."  book signing for me and I thank you all for making this possible, although I must admit it's still embarrassing.  Hard to explain.  I don't have all the answers to my life story -- except that I was raised in secrecy, hidden, forbidden to speak about "who" I am until the last few years.  

Thanks for all your inquiries, your concerns, your prayers.

DI DEAN